I seriously need to stop naming my lingerie sets after the boys I wear them for. I seriously just asked mom if she put Brett in the dryer
is it bad that I only want to go to my boyfriends house bc I want to see his roomate walk around with his shirt off?
Think they will judge us if our pre drink is a kiddie pool of jello shots?
Great I'll forever be branded as gym slut at the new gym.
if I die on the way please explain to my mother that I do not wear fishnets on a regular basis
It's like a party bus, but there's a glass, airtight wall separating the driver from the passengers, and once everyone's on, they pump vaporized THC into the cabin.
I can't tell you what you just drank, that would ruin the point of Mystery Monday.
You then proceeded to tell me how good of a cook you were and put raw cookie dough in the champagne.
You'd be amazed at how difficult it is to find pics of the helicopter dick
I am very proud of your internet skills
I swear to god, if you fuck the hot one you're paying me back for the shot I just bought her
Yeahhh, everybody is so helpful when a pretty girl is crying hysterically and has only one shoe and a six pack.
you know that feeling on acid where you think the world stops just to fuck with you? That's what it felt like.
It's not that I even wanna fuck these guys anymore, just cuddle that's all. My conscience has never been so proud.
Woke up behind one of the fraternity brothers houses in the grass wearing a guinness hat and aviators hugging a 30 rack box with a zonie on my chest next to a campfire.
I think there's a problem with society when I'm shopping for lingerie and I think "man some of these would make kickass shirts"
Rigtt?!
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