why didn't you poke me back
If I die tonight, wear a V neck to my funeral.
That girl's pussy is like White Castles, you crave it once in awhile, but you know next morning you regret eating it.
Getting sheets for college, what is the thread count that shows the least amount of cumstains?
630.
Our drug dealer just got busted, wear black tmrw
My present? It was a fake boarding pass he made in Photoshop. He litterally just gave me a one way ticket to Pound Town
He just sent me a winky face in the middle of setting up a drug deal. You don't do that.
No, no... it's pale and surrounded by awkward, curly, red hair. It's the Ronald McDonald of penises.
Dude, it's the frankincense and myrrh soap. Smelling like baby Jesus will get you laid.
He made me brush his hair afterwards because it made him feel like a ken Barbie.
God I hope the sex was good.
They're fighting and it sounds intense. Cross your fingers for their demise
Toss in some raw meat and play heavy metal music. It will insight violence.
somebody went from crying while watching Full House, to a full on emotional raging bull...I love this time of the month
Never has jello made me angry to the point of drinking. But here I am.
If I don't singlehandedly make your gf realize she needs to straighten the fuck up or ruin your relationship before I leave I have failed you as a friend.
Fun fact. I just wrapped myself in wrapping paper for a sext. Is this a new high or a new low stay tuned.
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