she was wearing a cheetah print one-piece and i slept with her anyway. big mistake.
I'm not a mortal combat character
but my vagina is
Mind blown. Apparently, it's PRErogative, not PERogative. I blame Bobby Brown.
at first i was worried but she assured me her frail vegan body would have no chance at conception.
Operation liquormelon is in full effect. We may die tonight.
Just orgasmed in traffic. Starting to have feelings for my commute.
that's all we do, eat and hve sex, eat and have sex. he thinks it's bad and that we need to talk more or whatever but I'm just not seeing the problem...
I took "we live within stumbling distance of the bar" as an invitation and challenge
Pro: Drunk Portland Strip Club. Con: Monday morning hangover at work. Pro: boobs. Con: Sleep deprivation. The Pro's are winning.
I would agree. Add some coffee to the booze. It will cut down on sleep deprivation.
I can't believe I came last night staring into my profile pictures eyes.
He came over last night and as soon as we started having sex Siri announced "you've arrived at your destination." I think it was some kinda sign
She called and said her prescription was refilled. I guess we are dating again.
Seriously just told the plant the cheese Pringles are mine.
He told me that when he bends me over that chair I remind him of a bull rider. So thanks for being the ex that helps my present sex life
Lobby closes at 2 AM on Thursday, but everyone walking still wants food... I could run a "Taco Bell Taxi" when I clock off at 2 and charge a dollar to give drunks a ride through drive thru.
Someones thought of a way to afford tuition.
Randomize
