I told him it tasted like his mom..needless to say we were asked to leave.
thank you for a lively/lovely evening :)
should have blown me.
thats the last time i clean cum out of my retainer.
This girl wants me to lick her pits
pits??
Yeah pits, I think I still go for it though
I wish you could order shots online.
i wish that every time i slipped on a sheet of ice i had the ability to recover with a michael jackson move
He painted his chest for the game... I just fucked an exclamation point.
OMG the post office opened my dildo! "we sincerely regret the damage to your package"
I'm setting a 12:15 alarm for a taco bell run. Be awake or never wake up again.
The only responsible thing ive done in vegas is shower and that was onky to clean vomit off me
I want what they have, but in the meantime I have a whole bottle of rum to which I'm quite devoted
His car is rigged up like the cash cab how am i supposed to not sleep with him
That commercial was clearly aspirational. I think Arbor Mist would pair nicely with Oscar Meyer
just won 200$ from the school for "liking" the anti-alcohol seminar. putting it to good use
how?
not even kidding, my fake id is arriving in 6-8 business days
MY MOM WALKED IN WHILE I WAS EATING THEM OUT AND STARTED ASKING US ABOUT THE PROJECT RUNWAY EPISODE WE WERE WATCHING EARLIER
Randomize
