I'm playing a drinking game with nyc prep. This will not end well for meeee
Everytime the gay dude pretends he's not gay, drink a cosmo. Everytime the crosseyed girl is crosseyed, kill her
she screamed "my eye!" and it brought me a surge of bad memories. except she was yelling about a lemon.
He's in bed with me right now. I'm wearing a towel and all I could wish for is my freedom. And pizza.
He had to carry me to the car. But then sat with me and waited for me to sober up enough to have sex. He's a keeper.
First and foremost she's my friend, but she's also a mistake I make when I'm drunk
I'm currently day drinking, studying and making corn. Don't tell me what I can't do.
I'm riding shot gun after Shawn took a dump in a happy meal box because we were making record time.
You. Me. Frosting and a bed. Lets do this.
I'm not even pretending to study anymore. I'm straight up sleeping in the library
I smoked out of two pipes at the same time while my friends wielded the lighters last night. It felt like I graduated to the next level of stoner.
I'M MAKING HIKING PLANS WITH THE GIRL WHO IS DATING MY EX, THAT IS PERSONAL FUCKING GROWTH
Would I be crazy if I drove 1,000 miles for some dick? What mile does it become ridiculous?
I do remember that in my dream I wasn't impressed with his dick.
I just typed "I've got a friend" and my phone autocompletes to "that's a dick appointment". What is my life.
Honestly, I am sitting in my room watching Ciara videos and thinking I am super jealous of how she rides it.
Randomize