Kroger has a sale on economy packs of some ridic brand of condom with a smiley devil heart on it $4.99 for 24
Sounds like a baby waitign to happen
I cont stop tolking in a british axsent
My phone has seen less use in the last three days than Tom Brady's condoms.
I only have two new blunt burns this year as opposed to freshman year's 6. This is growing up.
His roomates just started party boying me. He stood there with the look of horror on his face.
I thought the one perk of the low caliber of men I've slept with thus far in my college career is that I would never run into them in the library. I've been here for ten minutes and we're on number three.
mom brought her knitting needles with her. its bad enough to be in the ER on new years, but to be with the knitting parent!?
the point of no return was when you "drugged" his drink with glitter. face-planting on his dick was beyond.
He lectured me about the dangers of drugs while wearing a sombrero and doing interpretive dance.
He shit in a sock dude, you can't come back from that
I am still STD free so as far as I am concerned I never went to panama.
She just came home holding a fire hydrant. Yes a fire hydrant.
Night just started and I've already seen a woman headbutt a brick wall. Unintentionally. Epic to say the least
If you end up wanting to sit on his face, just make a sound like a dying giraffe and I'll make myself scarce.
whered you go
woke up in a ditch, shat infront of a little league game, slept in her stairway...i need to come here more often
Randomize
