Like worst hickies ever he always gives them like wtf
So I decided to put different foods on my dick to see which would feel the best
and??
Cake is only good when you eat it
Ok forget what i said about christmas break being awful. Chasing shots with fudge
its like national bring your ginger to the pool day or something
Woke up with string cheese braided into my hair- literally braided
Let's just say that watching the sunrise in a space helmet is really the only way to do it.
She basically needs a man who will never act up and take all of her shit
I'm even having trouble finding a guy who's taller than me with no unibrow.. someone needs to tell her its time to lower her standards
The only thing I remember is vomiting and then feeding my dog a Mcdonalds cheeseburger and telling him yolo
He practically cut off his thumb and she offered him a tampon to stop the bleeding
It's amazing the amount I can accomplish with a glass of wine in my hand.
Well, he hasn't actually seen me naked. Just my boobs... and the left side of my vagina.
Pretty sure I just got the ok to have a one night stand in Maui...from mom. I'd say that's a win in my book.
We were making fun of some people having sex on the beach, an hour later we were having sex on a golf course
Got baptized for New Years. In champagne and cheap vodka.
I'M NOT EVEN STOPPING FOR WINE SO I CAN GET TO THAT DICK QUICKER.
Randomize
