I JUST WOKE UP ON A TRAIN
I SHUDNT B ON A TRAIN
he told me it was a naked video of him so i opened it. i just got rickrolled while sexting
i'm considering texting him with "i'm leaving the country for a year, wanna fuck?"
do it. it's every man's dream.
The dog just did a longer kegstand than anyone at the party
We did a shot for each one. Father... son... and holy ghost. That wasn't enough though so we moved on to toasting dead relatives.
you were standing in two feet of water, screaming at people walking by to "call river rescue".
he pulled a $400 bottle of champagne out of the back part of his toiled and I was ready to blow him then and there
We left his house because I forgot how to drink water, I was just holding it in my mouth and then spitting it out, needless to say I don't remember the sex.
I just woke up from quarter beer tuesdays wearing 3 pairs of underwear, none of which are the ones I left wearing...2 Around my waist and one around my shoulder in an attempt at a bra. At least drunk me tries to be decent?
You leaned over so she could squirt ketchup in your hair and then started chanting "KETCHUP NIGHT!! KETCHUP NIGHT!!!"
woke up to find i out made out with his roommate before hooking up with him. breakfast was awkward to say the least
You were drunk at 5 You went to the dining hall and cried because your brain and fingers weren't working. Your RA came up to you and suddenly you became sober. I was very proud of you.
im so sad I can't openly talk about acid tab Sundays
You are not the cause of late onset lesbianism.
A good example of deductive reasoning: Knowing that when my girlfriend texts me "I promise not to smoke all your weed!" that she is...at that VERY moment...Smoking All Of My Weed.
Randomize
