No awkward lesbian experiences without me
he cried for an hour, then he threw up on my lap then started singing party in the usa...opera style...
I might not be able to enter cuba but that doesn't mean that a cuban can't enter me
The pick up line I used was "Grab my sack, you'll be back." Then I winked at her.
I woke up to blood crusted on my face. I don't understand
team rage. no explanation necessary
She's never going to forget it... Christmas Anal.
The only thing you accomplished yesterday was dry humping me on the floor of my work place WHILE I was working.
Another day, another engagement, another cat
He told me I was his first American. I feel like I should've brought a flag to plant on him.
We were still up at 6am, taking shots, because thats apparently how he liked to "get the day started".
On a scale from 1-10 how wrong is it to request "I Hit It First" at my ex's wedding reception?
Definite 12.2 but worth it.
Damn Instagram explore page. I am six months in to some girl I don't even know.
Dentist appt at 2pm get milk poured on my tits by 2am
A marvelous 12 hours
she said that no one there was hot enough for her so she then proceeded to give the passed out person a lap dance because he was "her type."
He's here walking around DRUNK AS FUCK in a Kobe Bryant number 8 jersey... Tucked in.
Randomize
