Did you see Brett Michaels get knocked on his ass?
Hurt me personally.
Knocked his cowboy hat off... Bandanna was still good though
be a good friend and just tell me i'm not pregnant
I got "discovered a new religion high" last night
Just rolled over and realized my vodka goggles are not as functional as my beer goggles
he has cookie breath... dont trust fat people.
i actually pissed myself from laughing when I saw the old man in lingerie carrying a spiderman purse. I dont know if he was real or if it was the tequila, but my head hurts.
I vaguely remember telling a bum she was worth more than this
the boys love us. they call us "the stoner girl suite down the hall". not very inspired, but flattering nonetheless
If you take a couple more shots you won't even know he's a mormon that drives a mini van.
Just went over my top ten highlight reel with that guy I'm fucking. It was like we were sports announcers. But about sex.
I just walked through the door and she ran up to me, hugged me, unzipped my pants and immediately started sucking my dick. Good day.
He started yelling "you tha man!" while I was reverse cowgirl
Is this really the life I've chosen for myself?
thought i saw a dude in a kilt yesterday, but then i realized he was doing a walk of shame. happy st. paddy's day.
We are so disgustingly codependent and I wouldn't have it any other way
Randomize
