Bitch is talking to much, howd u ever get her 2 shut up?
It's worth it.
How worth it?
Back door worth it
And she was only 16?
You say that like it's a bad thing.
I think I ordered pizza when I got home. The email said the delivery time was noon today. So if that shit shows up I am the most amazing drunk on the planet.
our conversations pretty much only consist of the phrase 'fuck you'. and the sex is fantastic. we've got a great thing going here.
So the TSA can feel me inside and out in front of 40 people, but they catch me fucking in the bathroom 20 feet away and all of a sudden their the decency police
she said she just "wanted a guy who she could cook breakfast for". HUGE MISTAKE. I'm never leaving
She told me I should be proud of my dick pics, then told me she was in love with me, then I dropped her off at her boyfriend's. I was a new kind of failure tonight.
VAL. THIS MOTHERFUCKER IS LAYING IN MY BED WEARING A CAT SHIRT, VAL. COME SAVE ME, VAL.
Your vagina felt like having sex with thanksgiving mashed potatoes. The best kind of mashed potatoes
I may have just sent her dad a picture of my penis. His name's Myron, right?
The way I see it, there's 2 types of friends. Those you should do drugs with, and those you really,really shouldn't.
I woke up next to a Big Mac box.. And had no sheets or clothes on. The night was a success I think.
Ive completely stopped wearing makeup. Not even eyebrows. Thats how sick of wisconsin I am.
Come to my place after work and we can discuss our finances over a coors delight and a fire ball shot
i only got to wear my halloween costume for an half hour before it got taken off.
Randomize
