I didn't know that people actually queef. Is this a real thing?
I believe so, yes.
Would you be offended if I asked if it has happened to you?
a pedometer??? no beatles?Steve jobs just took a dump in CA and it landed on my heart
I want nothing more to get stoned and go to your little sisters petting zoo party but I need to have priorities
there is literally a full grown man stuck between the radiator and her bed. i thought i kicked him out 20 minutes ago but nope we found him
You will never truly trust yourself until you have shaved your armpits, legs, and vagina in the dark.
WHAT THE FUCK JASON, WHY IS THERE A FREE BLOW JOBS BY LISA SIGN IN MY FRONT LAWN WITH MY PHONE NUMBER ON IT?! PEOPLE ARE PULLING INTO MY DRIVEWAY!
Awkward sister question: which game of thrones female left would you fuck?
See what happens when I don't get laid? I make poor life decisions, like buying baby ducks.
I just had to explain to an 70+ year old lady what 'coitus' was. This was not in my job description.
HOW AM I SUPPOSED TO BE A DRUNK WHEN ALL MY ENABLERS ARE BUSY?!
I need a "no soliciting" sign for your dick
I don't think Buddha would recommend a sexscpade across Mexico
Update on my sex life: my calves are sore from masturbating too much. It's a thing. Look it up.
Woman doing my Brazilian right now says to tell you she says hi...what has our life come to?
I'm currently using a band-aid to cover my bar stamp from last night while I ask my professor for an extension. That's a sign of getting more responsible, right?
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