You know you love balls. Don't act all "I-Don't-Love-Balls-ish"
she had the hairiest bush ive ever seen. it looked like a spoiled head of lettuce.
I hope i woe up in your car, or else i stole someone elses and slept in the back seat
why is it whenever you puke in the park there are always little kids on the swings?
she would be the type to have more hair on her twat than on her head
she has to be all "alternative"
A 20 minute car ride back to your car with the girl u had drunk anal with is the most uncomfortable thing ever.
Im really high right now and the vending machine is broken and giving out free candy. Please kill me, my life will never get better than this
Seriously... Things should be way more awkward... The entire female half of the bridal party INCLUDING THE BRIDE blew me in high school....
he told me he was a Boston Bruins fan so I took his hat into the bathroom and peed in it...I've never been a prouder Ranger fan
Guess who just rode home in a cop car?! Your Fav flamingo
He walked in at 7am saying that the police had his shoes and phone because he's being investigated for attempted auto theft.
what are you going as for halloween?
drunk, naked, & emotionally unstable
To be honest. I have two poptarts in my jacket pockets. No one knows. I am pro stealth.
THERE IS A MAN IN THE BATHROOM IN COLONIAL GARB GET HERE
Let's make this a nightly thing. You'll explain the Watergate scandal like you're telling me a bedtime story while I eat popcorn high as fuck
Randomize
