Who wears a wallet chain?!
The money shot is kinda like the "The End" part of a children's book isn't it?
you know that annoying kid in my psych class? accidentally hit him in the face with a door today. perfect end to the semester.
I've never been so happy to start my period. I'm gonna let everyone in the store see me buying tampons.
UD be completely fine. you don't lose control just keep a positive environment. for example i really want to lick the wall cause red is delicious but i don't have to.
So you know that marine I slept with, well his girlfriend just told me I was pretty, I almost feel bad for sleeping with him now...
Dont! You were just serving you country
Hey! I was tired. I threw up in two parking lots yesterday.
I standby a snuggie being perfectly acceptable attire for drunkenly walking your dog at 5am. Our new neighbors did not seem to agree.
I'm having a hard time existing right now. When I figure out how it works ill be over.
My mom just added me on Facebook... She has one like and it's Will Smith
She helped me out of the car and i face planted into the snow.....and just stayed there and took like a 30 min nap.
The laundromat is nothing like In the pornos
Yes but I said "let's get a dog" not a drunk human so some rules will be established this evening
He showed his fake to the cop and was like "does the coloring look off to you?"
If it makes you feel any better I almost got kicked out of the bar for yelling "enjoy your celebratory incest"
I love you.
Randomize
