Lesson learned: don't hide your vodka in your little brothers toy box.
this is a family affair. You're an embarrassment.
whatever it's not my family
i spent 15 mins trying to take money out of ATM with my drivers license saying, "what the fuckkkk" everytime it didnt work
and my herpes radar will keep us safe
so then you were screaming "GIVE ME KELVINS!" and heating things up in the microwave and no one knew what you wanted
I just used cruise control in a 25 zone. When will this hangover end???
I have her designated blowjob hair tie on my wrist. It's like a key to eternal happiness
As I fucked him you stood outside my door screaming, "I'M NOT JUDGING YOU!" over and over.
I was judging you.
Hey in a lighter note I also nutted in that cheerleader too if she got prego there would have been a team reunion on Maury
Life is so difficult sometimes. Can you imagine? Going through life, constantly creating boners everywhere you go.
I spy something regrettable...
Oh my god. Stop!! It was one time and I still can't believe it.
well considering the guy who just delivered my cookies had to console me as i had a mental breakdown in front of him i'd say i'm 4/10 right now, thank you
Lesson learned. No more vodka and toaster strudel
I think one of my ovaries is committing suicide. But that is a topic for another day.
I was taking this cougar home in the middle of the night I walked across the hall all naked to take a piss and ran into to some chick from highschool she said no way you are fucking my mom ran into her moms room and started yelling at her
Randomize
