I think it's just because she's got "I'll sleep with anyone with a decent car" written all over her face.
ice luge is my downfall...
...u mean upfall.
hey dude i know youre in the next room but me and your sister need a condom, got any i could borrow?
So I woke up today with someone's door knob in my pocket. I hope everbody else got out of the house ok.
you were saying "i am the vodka queen!" and then in a different voice replying to yourself "all hail the vodka queen! you are so beautiful!"
Drunk Tina signed up to be part of the crew team and got a text from the captain telling her there's practice tomorrow. Wtf
Make sure your heart doesn't explode. These are words of wisdom.
I NEVER left your party last night of anyone asks.
Yeah, I didn't wake up handcuffed to my bed either.
Slow dancing with the chandelier.
I could run a drunk marathon in heels
You aren't truly friends with someone until you play drinking games via text at 8:30 in the morning.
I miss my bedroom and my bed and being able to spray myself with my choice of 15 different perfumes so I don't have to wake up to the smell of my past sins
Yea. You locked yourself outside naked with nothing but running shoes and claimed it was a "parent trap thing."
Of course his mom thinks you're nice, she doesn't know you have sex for cheeseburgers
One time!! I like sex and food....
Only if I get to be Gritty
How would you be Gritty for a fantasy hockey league?
Don't worry about it.
Randomize
