Only now do I see "not intended for use on skin" warning. Wonderful. But hey, my dick smells like magic marker.
life just isnt the same w/o real world cancun
and I asked her"are you allergic to condoms latex like your older sister " she said "Idk this is gonna be my 1time"
I microwaved pizza rolls, a hot dog, and bacon in the same plate with no paper towels. I drank the grease at the end. I'm going to vomit everywhere.
i keep forgetting that not all of my female friends are bisexual.
I seriously just washed my dick in a public restroom. That's how dirty last night got
I tried really hard to get you laid last night. And by that I mean I asked a bunch of dudes if they were top or bottom.
I think he offered to cook me dinner or cook me for dinner. Not really sure. Just smiled and nodded.
Ok now I cleared out half the bar and Em and I have 5 Jameson shots lined up for you. You have 15 min.
Due to the events of st patties day last year I created a moral and ethical policy so that I won't get kicked out of the bar again. It mostly consists of not wearing pants so then I don't take them off at the bar.. and subsequently get kicked out.
its cute though when you google his name more than one mug shot comes up from different states
Well, it's a fine line between people-watching and boob-staring. It's a gray area. But we're in Paris. Let's leave it at that.
My coworker's brand new computer showed up today. He's on vacation for the next week. Brian and I are installing Windows 98 on it.
either he just commented on my nose ring or he's offering me cocaine, I honestly can't tell
WE JUST PASSED A FUCKING SPACE SHIP! NOT JOKING! A REAL FUCKING SPACE SHIP! THIS IS NOT THE DRUGS! SPACE! SHIP!
Randomize
