I tried karate at age 7 and quit after realizing it conflicted with watching new episodes of "Full House."
Dude michael jackson died, guess he's not 'stayin aliveee' any longer.
Uh dude that wasn't a michael jackson song it was the BGs
P.S. theres no milk for breakfast, but theres plenty of beer or red wine. you decide.
just fit an iguana in a condom...have pics
i normally make it a rule to leave when white people start rapping... but they had blow.
Yeah things got weird. You ate an entire bag of hotdog buns, then tried to catch a tree on fire with a candle.
these marshmallows taste like mayonnaise. like playing tetris on a gameboy, that's what these marshmallows mean.
yo your bro wants to know what time he got home and were you hosing him off
Did you see the video of me eating a marshmellow on fire?
I was THIS CLOSE. But drunk me wanted to play those washboard abs with a spoon, like an actual washboard. Apparently that hurts, so I just squished it out at home alone.
i took four shots of tequila, threw my fist up in the air, then went around the party showing everyone how to do the ninja turtle handshake. that's the last thing I remember
Giving the guy pizza was a good idea. Leaving him naked on the pool table makes you my hero
I caught a glimpse of his penis. I can only imagine what your mom's vagina goes through because of that penis
Why didn't we pregame for this?
Because it's breakfast!?!
couldn't remember his name. introduced him as 'mr multiple orgasms'
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