she didnt even puke last nite, shes finally hit champion status. i think im in love
As a driver I hate pedestrians, and as a pedestrian I hate drivers, but no matter what the mode of transportation, I always hate cyclists.
you did pass out in the elevator last night, so it could be motion sickness
new hobby: convincing random sorority girls around campus that we hooked up last weekend. i'm 2 for 5.
So apparently I shook her hand very polite, said weiner and walked away
I feel the need to send all my exes pictures of penises larger than theirs. Because they all must suffer.
Im in the bathtub drunk. Less than an hour before the interview. This will be the best or worst career move ever., support?
Aaaaand then she sang MDMA to the tune of the YMCA song, with appropriate gestures.
Dude he downed 9 shots of tequila, sang bohemian rhapsody with 3 randoms Wayne's world style, solo'd closing time, chased the hot bartender's dog all the way to main, tackled him, carried him back, hot bar tender hugged AND kissed him, then he does a jumping heel click and leaps into my car through the window. Next rounds free at the yeti. Needless to say your little brother is a tequila god.
Basically.
Do you think I shall pursue this journey to the center if the dick?
It's like my life is one of those movies where after a bunch of outlandish events that only happen in a movie the girl realizes her true life calling and lives a great life with a sexy man of multiple races. But I'm stuck in the fucked up part where 25 year olds come in their pants.
forgot to tell you your neighbor walked out of her house this morning just as I was leaving shirtless
Watching a guy masturbate in real time is a lot less theatrical than porn had me to believe.
Really I don't care what we're doing or watching. Your penis spends way too much time outside of my body.
Road head absolutely translates. That's the beauty of road head... It's so portable!
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