You drinking a lot?
No.
Define a lot
Omg. Budweiser tramp-stamp sighting @ Wal-mart. Best tattoo EVAR.
i ditched last period to have sex with him. i had to change into my skank clothes in the church parking lot. little kids were on the swings.
nothing about this is right.
halloween is SO much better on drugs, why didn't anyone let us know about this when we were kids
The fact that when I blacked in you were sober enough to kick me out of your roommates bed makes me question our friendship.
I can't wait for paintbang. I'm going to throw a marker at a child. There will be bail money in my backpack in m trunk. Don't use it on beer.
Until they make a bed that bathes you in your sleep, I will not be satisfied.
I hooked up with a British man... Wiz Khalifa has your bra... Couldn't have been a more successful night!
I just gate-crahed a party and met a state senator, so I had an interesting afternoon jog.
I just came so hard I growled. Definitely found my gspot.
I think I maybe realized he was too old for me when I went into his bathroom and he had anti aging face cream.
if youre gonna throw up it might as well taste like christmas :S
UGH FUCK THIS TRAFFIC I WANNA SUCK A DICK
That shit was hard as fuck. It felt like a mountain entering my vagina.
Is it sad or funny that I just bought two pregnancy test at the dollar store to give away to people on New Year's Eve while driving for Uber.
Randomize
