did you wind up at some random place? and do you remember face planting into the fireplace?
I'm afraid my bank account can't handle syllabus week.
two words...techno handjob
90 persent of me said don't pee on that fake plant. Buyt i did
Nothing says 'good morning' like waking up only to realize this chick was watching you sleep. She's crazy
best friends dont let best friends get an STD of the eyeball just saying
i just sent him like 8 different sexts and he texted me back about how good the hummus is that i left in his fridge.
How many vodka infused gummi bears count as 1 drink?
Speaking of gay, some dude in a life vest just goes, we should pull our dicks out! To larry. Were leaving now. I saw penis
Haha keeping the dream alive until Chinese New Year. I'm jobless with stitches in my face.
You slid down the wall and got into the fetal position. He was definitely judging... I was judging....
I am sorry. I am also on acid.
Got home and told boyfriend what happened. He was like "you made out with a guy you call Balls Deep?" and hi-fived me.
scotch tastings during the week is a baaad idea. i woke up w no pants but wearing my winter coat
Last night we proved the theory that "harder" is the worst rough sex safe-word ever.
Randomize
