Why do I always have sex on the first date when I know it demotes me to booty call girl?
3 inches of snow, below zero windchill and i just saw a dude in a wrangler with no doors, shorts a beanie and burton snow goggles. God i love college in colorado
Don't tell me wow. Tell me this is normal for college and in no way am I a whore.
i think we should start 2012 by becoming clean and sober for awhile and buckle down
ppsyche im wasted where are you
My dad and I just got asked if "we wanted a more intimate setting for our date". The world is coming to an end.
Yeah but I get laid and I know. He drank toilet water last night and he doesn't know about that either. Still makes me happy though.
You get home ok?
Uh, you stopped by my house at 4 am and woke me up, so yeah.
All I see when I think of you are dancing penis angels around your head.
I am currently in a U-Haul truck right now. Going to a party. I hate myself.
Stop your judging. I got free booze AND an oil change. You're the one whose always saying we're spending too much money.
He snorted adderall on my table. I have a feeling he's not trying to buy me flowers
Did I call him? He cried after taking my bra off. You tell me.
Don't worry you weren't as drunk as you thought. You only fell 4 times.
get your sex hands out of my capn crunch
ok so you're 100% sure this time that he isn't your ex in disguise again?
Randomize
