I will be home in 10 min. Dont be beating off on the couch
enter at your own risk
so the guy who showed me the apt today is now texting me and asking me out for drinks...he's at least 20 yrs oldr than me and highlights his hair, but part of me is wondering how low i can talk him down in rent during sex? wrong?
i just passed a truck with a bumper sticker saying "i'd rather be cummin than strokin." god bless the midwest.
we decided to do a scavenge hunt for ourself for when we walked back to our apartments. We hid taco bell behind some bushes. I think they are still good.
new plan: i think the keg will fit in my purse.
Speaking of roommates, Kelsey and I woke up to urine in our trash can. Neither one of us is willing to admit to it so we've come to the conclusion that someone snuck into our room in the middle of the night
My god this is going to ruin whatever Vegas left of our souls...
It takes a special kind of man to fart REALLY loudly right before entering a woman and still get some. This has been a state of bootytown address.
Dude I just came exactly at the crescendo of the Catalina wine mixer duet from step brothers.. Advance to next level.
I think my boss gives me work off weekends because he doesn't want me showing up hungover anymore..
Sometimes turtles just really trip me out man
we fucked in the backseat of my car at the observatory, right under the stars. it was a starry, orgasmic filled night
My soul is telling me that I need to take this exam naked.
just walked passed a black light...apparently he DID cum.
Adderall went through the wash. Took it anyway. Wish me luck.
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