is sleeping with your Political Science professor Politically incorrect?
Was he helping you 'cram' for your final, or just giving an oral exam?
this ugly chick literally cried last night because i wouldnt let her give me head
I wish Denzel Washington would coach my flip cup team..
She gave me a blow job and her mom gave me blueberry muffin afterwards. I love them.
They seemed upset when they walked out and saw a penis in a mouth
Every time I see him I get horny. I can't help it!
Just stop. You're making other wives look bad. We are all starting to hate you.
I think that's the first time Navy dress blues and a Ninja Turtles onesie have been involved in the same makeout.
He snapchatted me his dick and he's circumcised....BRB going to hug his Mom
im sleeping with a therapist...so you can talk to me.
And then we will celebrate by drinking and making fun of him. As per usual.
If you don't come home and fuck me soon I'm walking over there naked and dragging you home by your penis
Just checked out of walmart with a 30 pack of Budlight and a wiffle bat. Hello, Monday night.
What happened last night?
Lets just say you asked me a couple times if you had eyeballs..
Came up to an intersection and someone was blasting My Chemical Romance at like 9 AM. They're DEFINITELY having a good day
Clearly the Stanley Cup Finals good luck hand job IS necessary. You let the whole team down.
Randomize
