i just googled 'classy porn'. high, low, i dunno i just got bored of cum shots.
they say celebs die in threes. leave it to billy mays to throw in one extra COMPLETELY FREE!
I'm about to cry with happyness at the beer that will be consumed
Well, technically I had a shirt on, it was just around my waist.
As I was going down on her I noticed she had a tatoo on her inner thigh that said "Eat it like your birthday cake".
And it was confirmed to me that I did in fact cut my girlfriend out of her dress with my sword.
He left his own bachelor party to bring me weed. Then smoked with me. Tell me I'm not his favorite-ex-friends-with-benefits.
Btw...pregnancy boobs are amazing. I don't recommend pregnancy in general but the boobs are good.
So how much of last night are we going to pretend never happened? Enough to stay friends?
I never thought that it would get to the point where I would have to specify that by "hang out" I meant "fuck like rabbits." Growing up shouldn't be this way.
there's a strong possibility i came on your eyeliner last night bathroom sex was unplanned and rather messy sorry
I feel like I should be doing a victory lap around my house to the rocky music, or zapping and smiting people with my mystic wizard powers
What's the right thing to say when he sends me a picture of his penis ?
I told him I was on the pill and it was OK to fire away. I want to never have to wear panty house or ever go to an office again. This is my early retirement plan. I want half of his NBA money.
What's an appropriate gift to bring to my boyfriend's wife's baby shower?
Shame?
Randomize
