Hey sorry i havent responded. i threw up on my phone while i was sleeping
The drink u got me is pineapple something w. Cigarete ashes in it.ima drink it anyway
I got otter pops to cool the beers, it's an all around better idea.
I got a 69.7 in accounting. I have this whole doing the bare minimum down to a science
SEE! I KNEW I HAD A LONG-TERM REASON FOR BEING A SLUT!
Can you confirm that Victor fucked a girl for Jack in the Box tacos?
I cannot, but I know he fucked a girl for a Nerf hoop and a "Kingpin" dvd.
They only knew me as the lesbian that passed out in a bathtub. That's not what you call friendship.
Also, I think I'm too drunk to be at the gym right now. But how sober do you need to be for IM volleyball?
Sometimes you gotta take mushrooms and swim on a rooftop pool to figure out your relationship
I just tried to order ice cream on my bagel. I think I should just call it
so "excuse the stench" wasn't the correct thing to say when your boyfriend's parents walk in on you shitting. Live and learn
It's gotten to a point that when guys say "I'm gonna cum" I've developed a habit of responding "dooo itttt" in a deep voice. #isthatweird
Then while I was crying on his shoulder, he got a boner. Soo. I kinda just hopped on.
Jus pulled over and stole. Corn out of a. Field. ... get on my level
I put him in the supply closet, used the copy paper to build a fort around him and his wheelchair, then he fucked me in the fort.
Randomize
