Who knew there were guys that wanted to only stalk you instead of date you? Count on me to find them!
I asked my mom, she said yes...but you have to shower with grandpa.
See it, we're so close, i smell your vagisil
ive never been actively dumping during the pledge of allegiance before today...
Straight up if I get stuck with her I'm going to drink myself into a prison cell.
this is a reminder to untag myself in the picture of me flashing the photographer in the morning.
So yeah never trust sex tips from yahoo answers
If you have shit your pants within the past two years, please take a seat.
You don't have a wife, you don't have a dog, and you need a new bong. Don't make this any worse than that.
Matt's offering to breast feed it.
I'm curious as to what my outfit choices drunk me made for this weekend.
Had to sacrifice my vibrator batteries to the thermostat gods. I had a dirty dream and also almost a heat stroke.
I wore Yonce braids out last night and made out with a man and a woman #bowdown is right
He made me chicken tenders and margaritas in preparation for me to take a pregnancy test at his place later tonight. Like...seriously.
Then, even the devil himself would be scared of us. And we'd be bestfriends with Jesus. He would love us.
Randomize
