So it wasn't until I came that he pointed out the glow in the dark plastic star still stuck to my forehead. Fun times.
[insert really romantic bullshit about how much i love you and how beautiful you are so you will suck my dick tonight]
woke up to the trail of sugar cubes leading to my bed........was i that uncooperative last night
does pizza still have the 5 second rule in the bubble bath?
I think we can all look back on last night and categorize it under, " reason why Cory can't be left at the bar by himself"
I was informed last night that im not allowed to pick up the bouncers and carry them around anymore. Last sat is starting to make more sense
we're going to drop off one of our cars at the police station tonight so we'll be able to drive home in the morning
I'm not leaving bed today. And i guess my drunken ass last night hit my roommate in the face with a tiki torch then proceeded to cry while carrying around a picture of he who must not being name. I'm a piece of work.
Dude, the coffee is horrible this morning, Cass changed something about it
We ran out of Bailey's Irish cream...
This is what regular coffee tastes like?!?! Fuck the adult life.
We just broke into a lion king sing along. Understanding is not possible.
Currently hot boxing a fort I made on our snow day... This is legendary
I almost rear ended this hot guy driving a Porsche Cayenne just so I could get his phone number
I've got five complains from the landlord about she being too loud during sex in two weeks I'm marrying her
The tamale guy is fucking with me, I wanna sleep in he wakes me up; early wake-n-bake and he's late and I'm hungry
Can you explain the Transformers set up for battle in my living room?
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