I'll forget this but out at 4am with a lesbian model at lil waynes bday party for the record
I walked into cold stone and the guy started preparing a supersized birthday cake remix for "Mrs. Munchies"
I think forcing your little sister to drink with you on a Wednesday when she has school the next day is the low point of alcoholism.
She is only going home with him in hopes to give him herpes. She has been plotting some master revenge since 7th grade.
Just met me in 10 years...this lady keeps an emergency wine cooler in her bag
You can't say "they have anal bleaching for that" and then just hang up
I just banged your sister. Thats what you get for takibg my lunch money in 2 grade, boom, boom fiyyaa powaa
and then she started to quack like a duck and u started throwing bread at her
I keep confusing the name of her and her dog. Both are appropriate.
Everyone is now just referring to it as "the night Hannah couldn't get laid" so needless to say you didn't miss much
If he survived pride he can survive a gay bar
It's Breast Cancer Awareness Month!!!! What random hook up should check my tata's this year?!?!
A man can only lie in bed watching COPS for so long before he wants to do things that can lead him to starring on the show.
You ran out of his house yelling "I got the goods!" Then you pulled toilet paper rolls out from under your shirt.
Remember that guy I fucked last month? Well I'm watching his dog this weekend while he's in the Bahamas with his girlfriend. What is my life
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