Loo but I'm already drunk TINIGHT! CAPS ATTACK
Oh and ps....i was sleeping soundly until i woke up by the sound of amy on the phone with her mom sobbing hysterically because she can't stop having the shits.
I have 11 glasses of water and one beer on the table infront of me. Have to keep going to different bartends to get more. There are only two though and I think they've caught on
maybe next time you'll take an ex boyfriend warning you that she's batshit crazy as a warning instead of a challenge
Help. Me. He just whispered 'prepare yourself', & sprayed hairspray everywheres to make sure the 'air was crisp'
I've been very busy/drunk lately... Sorry.
Monday: I just need a drink Tuesday: OMG no more this week! Wednesday: oh shit how'd I get drunk Thursday: I'm glad you've stopped the pretenses
Adderal just makes me love life. I want to do so much. I just can't stop thinking about all the wonderful opportunities we have and how lucky we are and I want to make a difference in the world. I just have to reign in my brain and convince it that changing the world starts with a college degree, which depends on studying for these finals.
She fell asleep with me.... We found her pantsless in the dogbed in the morning... Russian foreign exchange students
The little girl I babysit saw pink plastic shot glasses in my car and asked what they were for and I told her they were princess teacups.
He's hot though. It's not like he JUST got out of prison. That was like months ago
Same I threw up in 3 different cities already today
My sex life is driven by spite and alcohol
He is in my tree wearing full on scuba gear ... Get here asap.
Why do I always have at least 8 men with whom I am conducting some sort of poorly planned love experiment?
Randomize
