I tried booty calling last night but apparently he was too tired and wants to meet up tonight. I told him planning defeats the purpose.
I just bought Christian paraphenilia at Borders for my dad's bday. I had the urge to tell them it wasn't mine, like I was buying laxatives or a dildo
Hahahaha. You probably would have been more comfortable buying either of those than what you just bought
that was the first time i tried it. why is it all sticky? its like somebody threw a glue bottle at my face.
Best news of the day: the hot chick at the funeral was NOT related to me... Thank god
Ive never seen someone more dtf than a soaking wet drunk girl who stumbles into your backyard.
yeah, and then after the convo was clearly over, my dad decides to scream "SIZE MATTERS" just to make things even more uncomfortable.
I just can't bring boyfriends home.
I saw the video from Saturday. So, how much did I drink for me to think I was a duck and strip my clothes?
I used the picture of my mom and I doing blow job shots in Vegas in the presentation for my Spanish final. Graduation here I come.
So the bump is from hitting my head in an elevator. Apparently I dived into a cab head first too.....
He had "Bad Bitches Only" tattooed above his dick. I don't know his name but I hope I find him again. I also don't feel that I lived up to the challenge.
I just wish he'd leave so I can vomit in peace.
Sounds like either a very good Friday night or a very bad Saturday morning.
So what did you do since you didn't go out?
...ate chocolate and watched bring it on....it's like I don't even know what it would look like to be straight.
If TJ is short for Trader Joe, I'm gonna fuck him
Personally, I'm gonna be Sexy Dobby the House Elf.
Randomize
