question: masturbation: how much is too much? I think i'm about to tip toe a fine line
Instead of asking if I had a condom she literally said " I'm not on the pill but I'm pro choice... your move"... I'm in love
Buying beer for freshmen. No matter what they ask for, I'm getting them Colt 45.
I swear this girl is like a Cross between Danny Devito and Anne Heche....the Lesbian Years.
Just violated the laws of fuck-buddyship and talked to him about my personal life. I don't like it.
thanks for waiting 12 hours to ask if I was in a ditch or not
I have your dog in a headlock. Se wants my mushrooms.
I have bruises on the inside of my thighs from sliding down the stair case...thanks for encouraging that slut show
I need to think of the best way to tell this boy he's not getting his pants back
My mom got me high and then dropped me off at a church.
I've abandoned trying to find a logical explanation of your life.
Well I let her practice her tattooing on me. This shaky dragon on my arm says Im getting laid.
It was Thanksgiving sex. I was thankful for it. Need I say more?
I used his number to look up his customer information at work. He's no longer saved as Magic Penis in my phone.
Some nights you just end up digging your mcdouble out of the trash and eating it. it happens.
Where'd you go?
Laundry, im. A responsible drunk
Randomize
