Well i threw up in my mouth a few times. But i successfully swallowed it. Still going strong.
is it weird that i feel like i won the break up because my status change got two comments and his got zero?
Just figured out why my bed smells like weed: I just found a bowl in my pillow case?
Is it a bad thing that the only time i wear nice clothes to class, is when i get too fucked up the night before and wear the same clothes i went out in?
Wouldn't pinatas filled with coke be awesome idea for cinco de mayo?
Their wedding is on my 21st birthday. I fail to see a way that this could end poorly.
Don't you realize there's more to life than sex and pizza rolls?
2013: the year of legs covered in hair and pregnancy scares.
"Let's do body shots off the freshmen" is officially the worst thing I've ever said.
valentines day is a day for loved ones to share. So me and my vibrator. Happy holidays.
I have a story for you. It involves waffles and getting naked with the local weatherman.
Have you ever been so drunk you pass out in the cab and everyone goes inside and forgets about you? I have
Just come home. We will have sex and Taco Bell. I'm feeling wild, I put on temporary tattoos.
I'm SO high. And there is so much pudding in this car
You know you're more responsible when you turn down your bed and make a clear path to it before you go out..
Randomize
