so are u like ashamed lol?
not really. i dont look at it as being homeless. im just going to pretend im on an extended camping trip
is not sure whether or not everyone at the club last night calling me a-easy is a good thing?
just dropped my bong into 7 pieces, and carried the glass shards around my house. dad saw the blood dripping down my arms, and asked if i slit my wrists. way too high to laugh at this.
When she showed me how she could touch her toes without bending her knees, suddenly her face didn't worry me quite as much.
You Were screaming "Im trying to get it in" and "stop cock blocking" while i threw you in the car
Dipping doritos in Grey Poupon. Why does no one treat me like the lady I am?
hotdog in my bra and i still managed to score. Got a bit freaked when he tried to eat it though. I paid 3 bucks for that fucking hotdog.
Yo I found your batman costume.... It was in my pool with a shitload of beer cans
She roared AMY HORNEY and hulk hoganed her shirt off. Fuckin marriage time bro
Weird thing is that's not the first time I've been felt up by a Santa. Happens every year
Is banging someone in the national guard considered a state service or a national one?
Please remind me next time not to call the ex who cheated on me to cry about the ex who forgave me for putting him in prison. It would be much appreciated.
this potential sugar daddy just sent me a photo of him butt naked in the woods saying he wants to "grow our spirits together." so i think i found us a new drug dealer!
You literally asked him, “Do you come here often? Do you want to visit my vagina?” With no hesitation
you need to drop off my dinner before you go see him because i'm not gonna wait until you're finished fucking him to get my damn chinese food
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