Chris' response to jim throwing up was taking off his shirt and saying WHO WANTS A BONER
Any day that starts with a call from my ex-bf... crying... is a good day.
he came over wasted, used the bathroom, drank some water, and fell asleep holding my hand. what kind of a fuck buddy does that??
she tossed me in the back of the car and said "god gave u the gift of life and I wanna swallow it"
He put used condom on the handle of the plunger in the bathroom.
he had me stop mid-blow job to make me use my phone to id a song on the radio..
i wasnt really sure how to responde to that.
Just smokin in the creek with some deer, they like the smoke, I know.
But he's not just anonymous male genitalia anymore. I've met him, I've seen his face.
I want to own their dicks and all the attachments
This family outing has commenced with me throwing up in an apple orchard
i got up, ate a McDouble, then went straight back to bed.
You sure know how to make a day worth living.
The one time my sister did shrooms she thought she was thumbalina. I can't live my life that way
dude, she has my telletubby sweats and my good sweatshirt hostage, I can't risk their safety with a breakup
Yesterday we were fuck buddies and today I'm meeting his mom. That escalated quickly.
True strength comes from lack of pants
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