I'm trying to bond with my sister... Its like getting to know a person I never met that I don't like
i just want to meat her and do terribly wonderful things to her vagina...
just googled chastity belt to see if it really exist..
He is in the front yard trying to catch birds out of the air with a fishing net.
I tried to tell him I love him but it came out something like "We're both fucked up and it works."
the head trauma was worth the blowjob.
it was like a congratulatory penis slap
thought the power was flickering out but it turns out im just blinking
By this time next year I expect us to have full time jobs that we can call out of so we can day drink on beautiful days like this. Oh, and grill.
I don't care how hot she is, her cat has pissed on me twice.
Long fucking story. But hey I got an orgasm and breakfast so I'm winning.
he just fucked me for my cheese.
We broke into a construction site had sex on a scissor lift and realized it was a church...tomorrow again??
I’m not washing my pussy with handsoap.
Put viagra in his coffee. I did that with Geoff last month and three hours later I had bitten through a throw pillow and gotten a noise complaint from a neighbor
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