PS - I'm in bed with an 18 yr old-am I a cougar?
No - puma.
two more shots til everyone in this club gets to see my cesarean scars.
So. Camera broke because I tried to wash it under the sink, kristi had to take me home and I woke up to my computer showing me that I googled how t take more than one shot at a time. I'd say the night was a success.
guess where i woke up this morning? If you guessed the hospital, you sir are correct.
she reminds me of the kind of girl who'd fuck in church if you asked. I can dig it.
Last night he tried to put me in their garbage can and then sprayed me with a fire extinguisher in their kitchen...that house is always interesting
She gave 2 thumbs up when Nirvana came on the radio while blowing me in the bathroom
He has an intense fear that my cat will attack his balls while we're fucking
She called him at 5 AM so that he'd be ready for her birthday breakfast and drinks at 6. This is why people don't need to wait until their 21st to have their first drink.
College has taught me that the "best idea" is rarely the fun one.
This is true but you can't really get fired from college
Is it bad that I recognize every dick in your dic pic collection?
I know the wedding is going to be a good time, I don't have to wear a bra with my dress
Ok. As long as I can keep Kevin contained to the room I'll be ok. If not u might have a naked puking Kevin at ur door
She started waving a nerf rifle around and demanding free booze.
I told him I hooked up with his best friend. And then he ate me out. I'm just THAT GOOD.
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