His mom made me a necklace that i am supposed to wear to prom. She included a note with it, which had a star trek quote. What have I gotten myself into?
No. You are not the Kate in this relationship. I will do what I want.
Facebook is used to stalk your friends, Twitter is used to stalk celebritie=s, and Myspace is used to stalk underaged girls. Everything else is porn. T=he Internet in a nutshell.
you didnt know i had herpes?
He washed my hair whilst I gave him head in the shower. Bored or gay?
We're too lazy too send a pic of out balls. Just assume this is a pic of our balls and respond accordingly.
She grabbed both of our dicks in the pool then said repeatedly, "this is my dream, this is my dream,"
In lieu of flowers, please donate to The Hungover Children's Fund in my name.
Why can't I hire someone to teach me how to be a decent human being?
The last thing I remember was you puking all over the inside of my door and him yelling "PUKING RALLY!!!"
Do you still have "be bumpin" written on your ass in glitter pen? Who brings a glitter pen to a bar? Or pulls there ass out for that matter...
Doing the walk of shame at 1 AM. Stumbled across a rave. This night is epic.
I think I'm at a stage of my life where I subconsciously purposefully fuck everything up just to see if I can find a way out of it.
That broad from the bar put her name in my phone as "The girl I'm going to marry in 10 years".
My fuck buddy just proposed... Correct me if I'm wrong, but doesn't that completely defeat the purpose of FRIENDS with benefits?
Now you can be friends with Insurance Benefits.
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