Sometimes I wonder if we could be friends if we lived closer.
Scratch that. Lia's boy toy's brother has a gorilla costume. This is gonna be great.
I just single handedly caused ferngully by printing the wrong 900 page document
It says i should accept HIV aids as my friend on facebook.We have 12 friends in common. I need new friends.
why is there cat hair all over my deoderant?
she wanted to smell more freshershest than you.
I tried to put a seat belt on in the shower. And I'm 80% sure I ate soap.
i got shots of sambuca dumped on my head last night. my bag still smells like licorice. making me nauseous.
it is a nice little reminder of the bruins dominance. if Vancouver had won, it would somehow smell of maple syrup.
Just witnessed my roommate pick her nose and eat it in her sleep. Remember, you made out with that.
omg I just had an epiphany about why I grew into such a whore....
HAVE YOU EVER NOTICED WHAT THE SPICE GIRLS USED TO WEAR?!? those were my idols, I never stood a chance
I've started a list of places i want to drink. To go along with the list of places i want to have sex. Lincoln's log cabin is on both.
hey now, it was 6 bucks for 5 shots. you would have lost your panties too.
They have a house rule that you get a composite for every 5 guys you sleep with. Where should I hang my new one?
Stay away a while longer.
Still not sure if they're cops or strippers.
I'm sorry but it's something you and your A cups wouldn't understand.
So apparently my bro is going to make me fix his tattoo this trip... He sent me a pic of said tattoo. Tattoo is of a sperm, on his penis, which was in a woman's mouth... Wth
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