I'm drive I can fine osifer
Should I hook up with a slut its your call
Yes. Wrap it. If you dont have a condom do it anyway. YOU ONLY LIVE ONCE.
great sex! but now the fight over who sleeps on the wet spot starts.
my hippie aunt just sent me some brownies with a note saying not to eat them under any circumstances until finals are over. excited.
Alright this has to stop. Without adderall I don't even have the motivation to get laid. College has ruined me.
your mascara is on the toilet seat from when you fell asleep last night
Is moral bankruptcy something you need to file for?
He just texted me from the outside of the hospital. He called the fat broad in the bar mrs snuffleupagus about 60 times and she broke a bottle of blackberry brandy over his head.
It was a perpetual wrestle for who got to be on bottom. Laziest hookup ever.
you know i have almost 1500 fb friends but not ONE drunk booty call?
She took her panties off, then farted in my general direction. I guess we're at that stage in our relationship.
oh, i solved that problem. i told him i wanted to steal my roommate's nephew. radio silence. haven't heard from him since.
I didn't even know his name until he texted me the next day and told me I should take a plan B pill. Thanks Danny.
He corrected my spelling during sexting.
Tequila should only be paired with the finest of dick
Randomize
