how do chicks with those acryllic nails wipe their anuses?
Sooo, drunk me had the sense of mind to write down everything that happened last night.....I bet you thought you'd get away with what you did to my parrot.
I hope the prosecutor is a dude cause my lawyer is hot.
Hooking up with one of the deadbeat dads from Teen Mom does not qualify as banging a celebrity.
I really have to stop waking up in hot tubs on Friday mornings.
After we were done the second time she turned to me and called me a Hardcore Armadillo. Also, her O face involves crossed eyes. You tell me.
My neighbour is taking her hamster for a walk on a leash. Come over now
Teenager with grandparents staying in their room: is to blue balls, as parent waiting for teen to come home safe: is to sleep. You will live- love mom
look in the field by the highway and see if there is a high heel there. Or some Taco Bell bags.
eating on the run again ?
It's gay softball weekend. Lots of hot gay strangers to go home with.
I was giving him a handjob in the woods and a family walked by
I used my dress as a plate for pizza rolls last night
I may have unintentionally punched your cat twice but he's an asshole anyway.
My dick has been in way too much crazy the past 2+weeks, but hey it feels good to fuck consistently again
Whatever you wanna call it i just wanna get railed tonight
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