Asian hipster sighting. About to tackle him and ask him to take me to chinatown
$4 taco and $400 parking ticket. i am not a cheap date.
i'm watching degrassi (go figure) and the episode is about jimmy not being able to get a boner and now he's famous and rapping about popping pussies..i dont get it.
never thought i'd see a ''climb of shame'' until she came down from the attic in front of the whole party..
I went to the bathroom like 8 times and each time I looked in the mirror and tried saying "I am sober." I burst out laughing when I got to "so-" every time. If you can't convince yourself, you can't convince anyone else. Fuck it, I'm going upstairs and drinking more.
You make your fellow Jews happy.
He blow dried my hair while I sucked his dick. Now THAT'S fucking teamwork.
It's 4PM and I'm finally awake.. I'm covered in dog fur and shame. I'd say it counts as a good night.
Just a heads up, i'm sleeping in te back seat of your car so don't be freaked out when you see me in the A.M.
I finally looked at the pictures from last night thanks for feeding me and pulling my pants up
We got kicked out of Walmart for playing cod with squirt guns of course it was better then prom.
Should I be concerned you put your last name in my phone as "danger"?
He is more interested in finding his sweater than he is in having sex with me. It better be a great fucking sweater.
I threw your vagina at him like a grenade. And sweet Jesus he caught it like a champ
I just choked eating whip cream from the can, and peed a little because I was coughing so hard. How am I still single.
you took my virginity. you can't have my alcohol too.
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