Note to Self: No matter how horny, turned on or in the moment you are, never go down on your gf after she had soccer practice.
Hulk Hogan has now convinced 2 women to marry him & I have yet to have a successful or healthy relationship. I am officially depressed.
This was all being yelled across a beer pong table as all important things should be discussed
STOP fucking him and come play in the snow with us!
He tried to bang a 300 pounder last night. No joke. I shotgunned a tall boy in a bar cuz the bartender didn't crack the beer. Cant wait till Nashville.
Rain ponchos don't count as shirts at the bar. FYI.
You said my dick was impressive. You thank someone when they say that. My momma raised a gentleman.
She needs more friends. Or a second therapist.
I wanna say I regret bonging a beer while having sex with Mike, but it helped me get thru it.
I'm gonna die. First I'm gonna throw up. But then I'm gonna die.
Recliner chair sex has moments of worry....just don't.
please don't forget about the bread in the toilet i am absolutely not dealing with that
I am the most hated person in hoboken. Ive been doing drunken cake boss impressions down the street for the past 20 mins.
Bleach your asshole, I'm on my way.
Who is this?!?!
His bedroom is the preferred destination of MILFs, cougars, recent divorcees and sexually frustrated wives
His penis is my hero
Randomize
