did not feel like going to store to get condoms last night so went to her pantry and got a sandwich bag and a rubberband
did it work?
nope
The only thing he got me during our relationship was a cum stain in my backseat. I choose winners.
literally followed a trail of condoms to the bus stop this morning. Ahh modern-day bread crumbs
When he was fingering me, it felt/looked like he was digging around for pocket change.
You had sex with him even after he literally described himself as a "coldplay guy"? There's a line you just don't cross. There is a line.
Does my status still say I suck cocks? I don't know how to change it
..i think i can hear you losing your virginity
so jimmy johns showed up at our party last night. our house is sponsored now. living the dream.
Also there's a dick sized hole in my tights...should I be worried?
I sent him a pic of my tits and he said "Word." I need a drink.
Just Everbombed a Guiness to make up for cutting out early last night. Also the Mars probe. Happy birthday motherfucker!
This late night dumpster diving sesh is making my quads cramp up
That was the first time I ever heard of a female getting road head while driving... thanks for the memory and making me happy ending..
I'll give you a blowjob in a Santa hat if it will put you in the Christmas spirit
Hey, before I head out, whats your policy on casual drug use and one night stands?
Randomize
