I dreamt Michael Jackson dropped his pants in front of me and I had to ignore it.
I actually had no interest in him until he started talking about his 4 arrests. That made him go from a 5 1/2 to a 8, easily.
I just dumped out my gym water bottle and filled it with white wine. This is the end.
Its not really a relationship, its more of a sex for booze program.
Apparently I tried to convince him to sleep with me by showing him that I could do dips....
got fuckng wasted at spring training, got a lap dance at le girls, got a burrito at filibertos, and still made it to my 5 o'clock eco class wearing a bikini top....I love Arizona State University
We didn't want to make a pit stop so I just helped my husband pee in a bottle. No one told me this was part of love.
In other news it turns out I like Heineken.. In a desert island kind of way
I think I just gave my niece a weed pinata...
Made my roommate send me tit pics so I could send them to someone because I didn't want to move.
We were mid fuck, and he did a Kermit the Frog impression. Is it weird that I was strangely turned on?
I may be asexual, but I owe you a solid from yesterday. I am a man of my word.
I HATE HIM SO MUCH I HOPE HE GETS IN SOME WEIRD ACCIDENT WHICH MAKES IT IMPOSSIBLE FOR HIM TO NUT
I woke up at 3am, top off, with campus security telling me to get dressed. Tonight was a GOOD NIGHT
Well hell, he's gotta sleep in the bed he's made. Multiple times. For multiple girls I'm sure.
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