We won't sleep together?
that drag queen yelled at him and touched me to make him jealous and said things like this is what a real man feels like. it was a thrill.
I spent a large portion of the night trying unsuccessfully to keep hayley (who was wearing a dress and no underwear) from doing handstands, but yea it was fun. the boys had fun
this is like her 8th guy since december, is she wasn't frumpy people would call her a whore
Shut up. It sucks being the ugly friend, I would know, but someones gotta play the role
Well I woke up with spatula marks on my ass and burns on my hands.
If it makes you feel any better, i gave her boyfriend a blowjob last week.
says the girl that drank her shots like they were in a dog bowl
So the guy who is making our IDs is in jail now for attempted murder, with no bail...
So no fakes?
I don't think I even want to know why you are sending my husband pictures of your nutsack.
I'm your Election Erection Connection
I retroactively revoke all sex we've ever had.
I feel like I got run over by a bus full of inebriated Scotsmen on the way to a soccer riot.
Don't send the creepy guy a picture of your penis. That's my Christmas wish
Just went grocery shopping with a vibrator in my purse and didn't even realize it. This is what Saturdays are made for.
He's honking my boob in his sleep
It's innocent and endearing in some way
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