yeah but I shoulda known it\'d be bad when he start rubbing my pubic bone instead of the clit! Awkkkkwarddd
you should have heard her the other night. no sentence related to one preceding it. it was like she was in etch a sketch and when she moved she forgot everythin
Thanks for getting me home last night.
No worries. I'll always be there for you, just like Mufasa.
I made a google map for "places I got blow jobs"
I'm so proud of your ability to turn my Charlie horse last night into anal sex.
I told her she has a very organized vagina; somehow she took offense.
i've never seen someone face fit so perfectly in a toilet bowl
Dipping doritos in Grey Poupon. Why does no one treat me like the lady I am?
but I'll probably watch some porn later so it's not a complete waste of a Saturday night.
We stayed up until 4:20 AM. The next thing I remember was waking up at 4 PM, like my internal alarm clock knew.
Are you complaining because you're getting too much sex to find the time to masturbate?
Well, when you say it like that it sounds silly.
Remember that time we got drunk tomorrow
Did you catch one of my beer pong balls in your cleavage or was that a dream?
So that prostitue I banged at Steve's bachelor party just texted and invited me to a BBQ at her parents. Never again doubt the power of the cock piercing.
Wanna get drunk and make some bad decisions?
Are you calling me a bad decision?
Randomize
