so basically i'm the" little sister", he's the "big brother" and we just fucked
the jail released me with 39 mardi gras beads. I need details.
Whenever someone from high school gets pregnant or has a pregnancy scare my self esteem grows a good 5 points
The musician playing at the bar just puked inside his acoustic guitar, then sang an encore performance. I love Louisa!!!!
Say what you want, but those Fraggle Rock DVDs have gotten me laid twice.
Its only 9:11 and I just somersaulted through a window. Its gonna be a good night
well I woke up with about $3 in odd change and a note that said "I'm borrowing your weed." So, no, it didn't go to well.
Suspicion confirmed. my mom has her nipples pierced
Way to crack the case Nancy Drew
Your father is wrapped in a table cloth singing, "America Fuck Yeah!" You are missing the time of your life.
What's the policy on calling guys who have kids daddy...
Drink water, eat food, and stop tazing yourself
He put his SoundCloud on his Tinder bio. I felt personally attacked.
It's 7am. I'm making pizza & watching the Matrix. I will not be bothered.
To answer your next question, yes, I'm drunk.
I'm covered in glow paint and shame. I'm never leaving this country
My vagina knows your penis is sad about Andrew Luck. You should come over and let her comfort him in his time of need
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