i kno its fucked up..but id rather sleep it off than seek medical attention right now
Threesomes are so awesome. You even have company on your walk of shame :)
grad school is all the worst parts of undergrad, without the binge drinking and bad decisions to make up for it
i woke up in the fire place with a lighter in my hand. if i would have died the night would have made up for it.
Don't worry we will all be making bad decisions soon
That's the most comforting thing I've heard in months
YOU COME FROM SAD WHALE FAMILY, DEEP IN OCEAN!
Let's just say he sent me a picture of his dick and I was more impressed with the collection of video games he had in the background...
He called me on my way to the bathroom and told me he wanted to hear me pee my beers out... That. Drunk.
He left an apology note saying he had to work and that there was coffee, OJ and food on the table with two Excedrin. I left his spare key with the door guard and she said "too bad I don't go for skinny white boys or I'd jump you both!" Best one night stand ever.
You're fucking beautiful as shit and we should have loving sex...
My horseshoe mustache feels at home at this bar.
That moment when I wear the same thing I did to a motel nooner to my family's Christmas party... Ho Hoety Ho bitches
But I made it seem like I wasn't hungover at work, so that's a plus.
we didn't even throw knives this time! it was just the carrot peeler
Whose house did we sneak into and play beer pong for 4 hours at last night?
I honestly have no idea
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