Why did you take off so early
No more beer. And also. Threesome. Maybe. Ill let you know.
Same, I didn't even get to be tarzan this summer
I wonder if she thought to herself "I'm gonna sleep with that guy tonight" when she watched me puke on the bar at 3 in the afternoon?
will i regret this in the morrning? probably. but every decision is good during happy hour
It's that "make a Pringle and Twinkie sandwich" kind of depression.
I refuse to apologize. Any dick that comes that close to my face uninvited is gonna get bit
did you know that my friend knows a guy with 3 balls what the actual fuck
I have to date her we need a place to stay for tailgating
Drowning in science and also vodka. Hope you're having fun.
Paige is home safe.
Actually, she's here now, punching me in the face. You should've kept her keys.
oh so have I but I'd still suck a dick or 20 in the name of freedom.
I was planning out a scrapbook to memorialize my affair.......and that's when it hit me, I don't make good choices. On the upside, the scrap book came out great and I am glad I saved all the gate passes from the airport.
Oh my God it's like my cock was dipped in lava
I thought it turned out lovely. You got to see me almost naked and I got to be stoned to the point I was content with
Wtf when were you almost naked??
Ik youre sleeping but fyi its 5:32am I'm sitting in the middle of the road bra less and shoeless with boxers in my hand and no ride. Shits real crazy.
Randomize
